An Independent Chislehurst? Or, The Ballad of The War Memorial Crossing Or, Abstain, Abstain, Absent
An Independent Chislehurst?
Or, The Ballad of The War Memorial Crossing
Or, Abstain, Abstain, Absent - A Lament
"Chislehurst is a special place,"
You often hear folk say.
"We love it here, suburban space -
We'll never move away."
View of White Horse Hill embraces
The City to north-west.
Further west great London places.
It really is the best!
The capital's ten miles away
When trav'ling on the train.
For work and play, whatever day,
Let B R take the strain!
However, on the other hand,
South, sixty miles at most,
You'll find yourself getting tanned
Relaxing on the coast.
Your thirst can easily be slaked
When you reside in Chis.
Nine pubs there are - highly rated -
For spirits, beer and fizz.
If shopping's something you quite like
Buy clothes that you'll adore.
Cards and gifts, nought to dislike.
Can even buy a door!
If fuzzy head you must eschew
Then seek a drink more light.
Chislehurst's abstemious too
But may give you a fright,
For coffee shops are everywhere
In Chislehurst's High Street.
Of soulless chains you might beware
Though others are a treat.
On Sundays work is sacrificed.
Nine churches you will find.
To sing the praise of Jesus Christ.
The saviour of mankind.
Oldest for worship of God's son
Known simply as St Nic's.
Even there once worship's done
Meet for a caffeine fix.
A library? Yes we have one too.*
A place to pick and choose.
Established tome or someone new
Who writes just to amuse. (Ahem)
Maybe you'ld like a woodland stroll?
In which case - come on down!
Fresh air for all we can extol.
A semi-rural town.
With such good schools you'll have much fun
When vying for a place.
For daughter fair or squeaky son
To form their learning base.
Come take a look and you will see
Why often folk move in.
There they remain - great devotees
Despite the biggest sin.
Because divided is this place
And something you will rue
If old or young or slow of pace.
It's called A 2-2-2.
To the east there's Royal Parade.
The old part it's agreed.
With shops, pubs, churches and some trade.
That's all you'll ever need.
But you will often find homes too.
Also for those in care.
Some schools with pupils passing through.
You'll find them all up there.
More of the same out to the west
In Chislehurst's High Street.
But walking there you may have guessed
Athletic, dang'rous feat.
Red, amber, green - for those who drive -
Slow down the traffic flow.
But when just red for seconds five
What do the children do?
Or adults old, infirm, not fast
When crossing Bromley Road
Once red light jumpers have all passed,
Rememb'ring Highway Code,
With four seconds now left to cross?
Look right then left then right.
Two seconds then the cars criss-cross
Once more to give much fright.
We take our lives into our hands
Or turn and walk away.
For there's no zebra at this place
To say, "Cars, please give way."
It's not that no one cares somehow.
The residents are kind.
But counc'lors must do something NOW
For all our peace of minds.
A crossing NOW is what's required.
Four thousand ticks obtained
For petition all much admired.
No Zebra's still maintained.
How 'bout a bridge built way up high?
Something we really need.
It could reach right up to the sky.
That surely would succeed!
The traffic would not need to stop
But travel full straight on
With pedestrians up on top
And traffic jams all gone.
Or maybe go deep underground
Down into flint and chalk?
Some ghostly Druids all around
When under road we walk.
Why struggle up or stumble down
When we could just go straight?
Let motorists for a minute frown:
It isn't long to wait.
But dinosaurs aren't on the side
Of old or young or slow.
So safer crossings they deride
'Cause, "Party just says no."
No party games! We have no thirst
In Chislehurst's fine ward.
We need three folk who put us first
Whose message strikes a chord.
Election time soon is coming!
"Vote Tory," now is grim.
Give the dinosaurs a drubbing -
Put Independents in!
© John Hemming-Clark 2022
Photo acknowledgement: https://twitter.com/ashfieldlane